The Real Story Behind Beauty & The Beast
by MidNightTheMagnificent
Summary: I'm going to tell you Beauty & the Beast, but I'm going to show it to you through a prism, so that you'll never see Disney's cartoon version in quite the same way ever again.
1. PrinceRich The Beginning

**MidNight's Twisted Tales: The Beast**

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NO! This isn't about "Beauty & The Beast"! It's about BEFORE Beauty & The Beast! Enjoy, my friends.

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Once upon a time, the handsome Prince Richard was trying to get himself a girl. Unfortunately, all the women he went out with were only interested in his charming good looks. More than a little turned off by all those shallow, superficial bimbos, he turned to Internet blind-dating, but those candidates were no better. They all just turned out to be shameless gold-diggers. (Perhaps the problem lay in his choice of a screen name? PrinceRich.)

At his wits' end, Prince Richard tuned to the gypsy (with the gold-capped tooth) at her pad down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine.

The gypsy witch looked at his palm, and she made a magic sign, she said, what you need is Love Potion No. 9. She bent down and turned around and gave him a wink, she said, I'm gonna make it up right here in the sink.

It smelled like turpentine, it looked like Indian ink, he held his nose, he closed his eyes, he took a drink.

Without a thought, PrinceRich(it's catchy!) gulped down the little bottle of Love Potion No. 9, & immediately, a strange sensation came over him.

A horrific change swept through his body. His nose lengthened till it became a snout. His perfectly manicured hands twisted into sharp claws, & his hair. That went out of control, growing & growing until he was entirely covered in a coat of magnificent brown FUR.

"Witch!" PrinceRich hollered, in despair. "What the fuck have you done to me?!"

The Gypsy Witch merely crackled nastily. "You got your desire, Prince. Now, you can be assured that any maiden who loves you will truly love you for who you are inside & NOT your good looks, nor your riches. For you'll remain this way until a TRUE love's kiss breaks this curse." & still laughing nastily, she disappeared in a puff of black smoke.

So, PrinceRich slunk back to his dark & gloomy castle, tail between his legs, & he hid there for a long longtime, unable to bring himself to face the world.

Will PrinceRich ever get his handsome looks back? Well, that's a story for another day. Maybe.

The End (for now)

2nd Oct '08, 11.34am


	2. How PrinceRich Got His Good Looks Back

**MidNight's Twisted Tales: The Beast:Who Needs Beauty?!**

Sure, we all know that Beauty eventually breaks the curse(or NOT! As this tale will reveal...), but PrinceRich isn't the sort to sit around moping, waiting for Beauty to show up, is he?

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After his little incident with that fateful bottle of Love Potion No. 9, PrinceRich tried all methods possible to get his human form back, & while searching through his vast library of spell books, PrinceRich located a damn useful (& more importantly, RELEVANT)magick to aid in his situation.

Thus, armed with this spell, PrinceRich kidnapped a fair number of handsome young men from the village near his castle. Back home, he would skin the victim(s) alive (taking care to cut them open only from places hidden beneath the clothes), climb into the skin, & with the intestines, sew the skin up from the inside. Thus, in this way, PrinceRich could take on the appearance of the young man. Unfortunately, human skin decomposes quickly, so one skin would only last him 2 days, at most 3 before it all fell apart. Still, it was effective, if tedious, so PrinceRich depended on this method to resume Human form for a time.

Soon, the novelty of changing skins constantly wore off, so he consulted his magical contact book to see if anyone could help him to regain his old appearance.

There was,

-The Wicked Witch of the West,

-The Evil Witch of the East,

-The Nefarious Witch of the North, &

-The Sadistic Witch of the South.

Deciding sadism suited him the most, (he had been skinning young men alive, after all!) PrinceRich called up the Sadistic Witch of the South, making her an offer she couldn't refuse.

"I know everybody offers to trade in their souls... yada yada yada... so I'm offering these 5 pretty young things for use as your personal TOY BOYS!" PrinceRich sweet-talked her into restoring him to his handsome Human form.

The Witch agreed, the deal was closed & POOF! PrinceRich regained his handsome human appearance.

& so, the once-again handsome PrinceRich lived out his good old bachelor life happily ever after, never again lusting after beautiful young virgins(but **female**, this time!) except very occasionally, to indulge in that ritual of skinning people alive. (Old habits die hard. Mawhahahahahahaha!!!)

5th Oct '08, 11.35am


	3. What's The Deal With Beauty!

**MidNight's Twisted Tales:PrinceRich/The Beast-What The Deal With Beauty?!**

Ever wondered how Beauty got messed up in this whole Beast tale when (now that you know the true story of how PrinceRich lost, & gained his good looks) it was all the doing of my good friend Queen of the Shadylands, aka the Sadistic Witch of the South?!

Well, I did too, so _just for you_, my dear readers, I tracked PrinceRich down again.

(Thankfully, it takes nothing more than a pair of hot legs & a lot of booze to get him talking in his sleep after fucking him senseless. Hehe!)

Here's what he had to say...

"Beauty? Oh,that's just a load of bullshit that Disney was fed.

Belle was actually the sister of the town's Most Eligible Bachelor, Gaston, whom I'd kidnapped and clapped in irons in my dungeon, pending the need to strip him of his skin, for my magick spell.

About a week after I'd first kidnapped him, this skinny bitch, Belle, showed up, saying that she was here to rescue her dear brother.

I led Belle to the cell where Gaston had been held just a week previously, & the lass rushed inside, calling 'Gaston, my dear brother, are you-'

Suddenly, she realized that she was talking to an empty cell, but I'd already slammed the door shut, locking her inside.

'Come back here, you mangy beast. What the fuck have you done with my brother, you flea-riddled walking carpet?!'Enraged screams emerged from within.

'Sorry, milady, I was hungry, but if you look to the far right corner, I believe you might still find some scraps remaining. An arm & a leg, if I remember correctly.' In my defense, I swear that I did apologize to her sincerely, at that time.

& everyday, I would bid my servants send to her cell a delicious, lavish, 12 course meal, in hopes of fattening her up to make another delicious **human** meal to fill my seemingly bottomless Beast's stomach, but Belle continued to remain the skinny bitch who'd first come knocking at my castle door.

Still. I could hardly let her return to her village, now that she knew all about the fates of the handsome young men who'd regularly disappeared from her village, could I? So, I continued to keep her locked up, in the deepest, foulest pits of despair in my dungeons.

Soon after, I called up the Sadistic Witch of the South, & regained this handsome human form which you are shagging with such lustful fevour.

Now that I no longer had need of the young stud's skins, I wiped all their minds blank as a slate(thus, creating the first ZOMBIES!) & returned them to their villages.

As for Belle, well, I was hardly going to let her off that easy after all the bitching I'd had to endure, was I?!

I may be human again now, but the primal joy of skinning people alive remained strong in me, so Belle was, how do you put it? My first experiment in an acquired taste... (Skinning hot FEMALE virgins for a change, how about that!)

Anyway, when the villages realized that a terrifying monster no longer haunted this bachelor pad, & that Belle hadn't returned from this place-all the boys missed the strumpet. Oh yes, Belle was a talented whore.-They sugar coated their own **assumption** of the events & sold the rights off to some fella called Walt Disney."

With that, PrinceRich concluded his story, turning his back on me and falling silent with a snore.

So now you know. Oh, & moral of the story? "Assume makes an ass out of (u) & me." Hehe!

6th April '09,11.41pm

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Now, people, if you loved this story, you may be glad to know that these three chapters are actually part of a much larger collection of work, MidNight's Twisted Tales, which can be found under my FictionPress account, **MidNight The Magnificent**. See you there!

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